Emily, are you aware that you are a 5 year old that figured out how to multiply all on your own? Are you aware that you have a very strong desire to, let’s say, lead? Are you aware that you have the softest skin on your arms? That you don’t swallow when you’re lying? Lyla, are you aware that you have made up your own language, through song and spoken words, and you actually remember them from day to day? And you’re 4. Are you aware that you are the only girl in this house with a normal pinkie toenail? Did you realize that you use humor as a crutch? It’s ok. All of it. It’s who you are. In fact…
I may have more than one personality. I may be paranoid. Heck, I may have a diagnose-able disorder. I’m anxiety ridden, I sometimes vomit verbal nonsense, I could even have a touch of just plain bitchiness. I’m also a mother, a teacher, a wife, a proud Miley Cyrus fan, an exercise enthusiast, a closet girly-girl, a Little Debbie oatmeal cream pie freak, and I swear I have a bit of a sixth sense (legitimately). Yep, I’m a complex individual. So are you.
I also spend hours upon hours psycho-analyzing everything I say and do. And everything everyone else says and does. AND I psycho-analyze what others may think about what I say or do. It’s really exhausting, and a full time job.
I wear my heart on my sleeve. I bare my soul for anyone and everyone to see. I am a very sweet and giving person, and I feel misunderstood most of the time. I’m also bull-headed, full of pride, and extremely unable to take a compliment. I am aware. I am fully aware.
Aware – having knowledge or perception of a situation or fact.
By the way – I LOVE that the word ‘perception’ is used in the definition.
So what do you do once you’re aware? I don’t write this or any other blog to tell you how to live or that you’re doing it wrong. I guess I’ve been doing this in hopes that you’ll just be aware. Own your present feelings. Own the good ones, the bad ones. Own your present actions, no matter how great or how disgusting. And move on with something that works for you.
Most of the lessons I’ve tried to present to you girls via this blog have revolved around living a loving life, living a judgment free life, and truly listening to those around you. It took me months trying to come up with other good ideas for me to realize that these lessons in fact are for ME, and you will learn them THROUGH me, NOT by reading this blog one day. I hope you can grow up living the examples I’ve tried to set, and I hope it’s ultimately because you are aware of who you are, what you stand for, what is going on around you, and how all those things play into each other. How DO they play into each other, you ask?
~Girls, this part is for anyone else that may be reading.~
Let’s take Facebook as an example. Or any other social media, but FB to be sure. Ever avoid FB because you know you just can’t take another scroll down’ November Thankful Status Lane’? Avoid FB because you know your feed will be full of nothing but pictures of people doing life better than you? Ever have a great moment in your house with your own family and feel your hand involuntarily reach for your phone so you could post your pride all over FB – ASAP, or get a really cool gift or good deal that you just HAD to share with everyone? Ever get in a kick-ass workout that would make BeachBody blush and then share it on FB…just in case you might inspire someone else (and then incessantly check it all day to tally up all the ‘likes’)? No…just me? Well, at least I’m aware! J
Good or bad, annoying or refreshing, Facebook and other social media reflect our Collective Conscience, which is just a fancy way of saying it reflects what is going on in the world and with the people in it as a whole. Collectively (and individually) we have waves of good, bad, annoying, refreshing, sad, happy, peace, unrest, etc. We all feel these things. We all have a basic emotional need to be a part of something bigger than ourselves. Social media is addicting to those of us on it because it’s an easy way to access something bigger than ourselves and to feel included…or to exclude yourself from it sometimes, too.
~Back to ya, girls.~
Anyhow, all this to say – maybe working on being judgment free, living life with love, and really listening to others doesn’t have to be a lot of work as long as you’re aware. Be aware of your own vicious cycles. Be aware of what really works for you in the tough times and the good times. Be aware of those around you. Just be aware. You don’t have to necessarily DO anything. Shifting your energy to just being aware. Being present. It may just be the catalyst you need to get through the holiday season, or past a bump in the road, or around a sticky situation. Shoot, it may even be the catalyst that opens new doors to new friends, new hobbies, new interests, new approaches to those sticky situations…might even open your eyes to pain and suffering you didn’t know existed around you. Trust me, it’s there in all it’s glory 100% of the time!
I really want to pick a month and dub it Awareness Awareness Month, but I think they’ve all been taken! Until next time…
Simply, Your Mother